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Terraforming Mars
The original Terraforming Mars is so old it needs to be in bed by 5 and demands to speak to your manager. It predates plastic components. Franz Ferdinand was headlining parades when its first print was released. Its cover is so unappealing Barnes and Noble shelves it with history books. It came out in 2016, meaning no fresh-faced gamer wants to drain their brain playing it. Afterall, there are currently, when last I counted, ten kabillion engine builders out there with 9 billion of them dealing with hand-management. And wouldn’t you know it, all of them have better-than-sh*tty components.
But Terraforming Mars should not be ruled out by those who have not played – its hook sinks in deep during set-up. Your first decision is to pick a corporation, 2 preludes (cards that give you resources), and up to ten cards to create your starting hand. It’s like performing surgery on your first day as a Walmart greeter. It’s intense. Throughout this epic engine-builder, there are three emotional phases of the game that always occur in the same order, yet the d*mn game never feels repetitive.
Gameplay
In Terraforming Mars, you play an asymmetrical corporation, drawing and drafting project cards that will be played to create an engine. The game ends once all three terraforming parameters – oxygen levels, temperature, and creating oceans – have all been completed. Since you receive VP each time you increase one of these parameters, players are racing to the end as they terraform as often as they can before all are complete.
Like many other hand-management engine-builders, all cards are unique, allowing you to terraform the planet in a different manner than other players, as well as play cards that combo and allow you to score points in other ways. The combos in this game are thematically strong as you advance science, breed animals, build cities and forests, redirect comets, and even bring down a moon onto the planet.
With the variety of cards (over 250 in the base game) and the numerous engines to choose from, all games of Terraforming Mars feel unique. And, unlike Wingspan or Arc Nova, the majority of cards WILL be drawn at some point, allowing you to plan long term on turn one. This is also an engine builder that doesn’t end when your engine is complete, giving you that feeling of satisfaction as you use it to score points near the end game.
The Hook
The Milestones
Each game of TM will have six inexpensive public goals that all players can aim for – known as the Milestones. When you achieve one, you spend a measly 8 dollars to score it, and now no other player may score that milestone. To make matters tighter, only 3 of the 6 may be bought each game. Each will score you 5 points, which sounds small at first, and might even come off as a distraction from your engine-building.
In your first few games, you will most likely ignore them as you dedicate your engine to solving the age old strategy game mystery of “what in the f*ck is going on?” But after several plays, your hand-management decisions will begin to take the various milestones into account. Your ability to draft and build an engine with the milestones in mind is key to becoming a better Terraforming Mars player.
But eventually you will experience a game-defining moment that all Mars players suffer – the game where one player buys 2 of the milestones … or in my case, all 3 were bought by one heartless chap. In a game where the winning score is often under 100 points, 15 points that you just lost is a huge kick to the face. This moment becomes seared into the part of your brain reserved for cold-hearted revenge. For the rest of your life, you play the game differently. It finally occurs to you – 8 bucks for 5 victory points IS THE CHEAPEST SH*T YOU BEEN SLEEPING ON. and if you can get all three that is 24 dollars for 15 points. F*CK ENGINE BUILDING THAT SH*TS MINE!
These first rounds are intense and it does not let up until that third milestone is finally bought.
The Turn
Milestones are Gone
Once the third milestone is bought, you can relax, put up your feet, and dedicate your powers as CEO to breeding antlered space donkeys. Or whatever weird *ss engine you’ve begun. This usually occurs in round 3 or 4 and is bizarrely one of the most relieving moments in Terraforming Mars. You have just spent the last 30 minutes fighting tooth and nail to get at least 5 of the possible 15 milestone points – when the final one goes, your mind takes a good 10 seconds to celebrate and recalibrate. This is true even if you sh*t the bed and purchased NONE. It still sucks if another player paid for 2 of them – you may want to flip the table if someone bought all 3. Either way, the game’s trajectory swings like a pendulum into the comfort era of engine building. You inevitably had started SOME kind of strategy while pursuing the milestones, and now you can concentrate on the main reason we all play Terraforming Mars – to build the most decision-intensive multi-faceted machine seen in any board game.
The Bite
Awards Season
The bite of Terrafomorming Mars is an atmospheric change at the table. It’s triggering moment isn’t an action, but a silent thought all players suddenly think in unison – “When can I afford to buy the first award?” I don’t mean ‘afford’ as in price. I mean afford as in “If I buy it, will that sh*t-head Tommy sack-slap me and steal the points?”
The awards are similar to milestones – 6 different ones are available and only 3 can be bought. But they are worded as such: “The player who has the most of X at the end of the game will score 5 points. Whoever has the 2nd most will be given 2 points.” They are funded during the game, but awarded at the end. So the problem becomes obvious – if you pay for an award that gives 5 points to the player with the most cities, every piece of sh*t you invited over for game night will aim to saturate the board witht their own cities.
You can try and wait til the final round to buy one, but unlike milestones, these f*ck*ng things ramp up in price – the first is 8, then 14, then 20. 8 bucks for 5 points is a cheap steal – for your enemies. Waiting til the game’s end to fund a 20 dollar award, and funding an 8 dollar one early, are equally batsh*t stupid things to do. But you should fund one at some point, right? IT’S FIVE POINTS IF YOU DO IT RIGHT! This creates a meta-mini-game. You begin by watching how the other players play, draft, and pass. If no science cards come your way in the draft, is someone hoarding them? That award may be bought soon if they are. Same goes for the Venus cards. If one player ups their money production to ten before anyone else has five, they definitely have their eye on the banker award.
This mini-game of player monitoring coincides with the finale of temperature, oxygen, and oceans. It leads to an ending with players revealing all surprises they were holding in their hands in order to raise the remaining parameters and steal awards others have funded. The last few drafts can be maddening if you are looking at multiple good cards (“I have to pass 3 of these to my neighbor?!?”). The awards cause the last few rounds to become an obscene situation – multiple players jockeying for them can cause a 30 point swing!
If you are a competitive person, the end of TM is a thrill ride. And if you are anything like me, you will want to shuffle up and deal again once the game is over.
